Sage Romantic Advice for Valentine’s Day

From The Norwood Gipsy’s Fortune Teller, published by W. S. Fortey and housed in our Children’s Collection of chapbooks, comes a set of helpful tips for procuring long-lasting romantic happiness. Examples include how to choose a husband by the colour of his hair, various methods to have your true love appear to you in a dream, and a particularly violent and smelly way to determine whether your crush is meant for you. Eat your heart out, Seventeen Magazine.

Black.—Stout and healthy, but apt to be cross and surly; if very black and smooth, and a large quantity, will be fond of where he fixes his attachment, not addicted to jilting, make a good husband and take care of his family; but if short and curly, be of an unsettled temper, given to drinking, somewhat quarrelsome, will shew much fondness at first paying his addresses, but be unsteady and forgetful afterwards.
White or Fair.—Will be of a weak constitution, rather stupid, very fond of music, will cut no great figure in the world, very moderate in his wishes, but will be the father of a large family.
Yellow. — Inclinable to jealousy.
Light Brown.—Neither very good nor very bad, middling in all respects, rather fond of the female sex, but upon the whole a good character
Dark Brown.—Sensible and good humoured, careful and attentive to business, generally makes a good husband.
Very Dark Brown.—Of a robust constitution, and of a grave disposition, but good tempered and sensible, very fond of his wife, though he may chance now and then to be careless.
Red.—Will be artful, cunning and deceitful, and make love to any woman he may come across; loves his wife so well, that she will scarcely have any clothing to her back; but is generally of a lively temper.

TO SEE A FUTURE HUSBAND.—On Midsummer eve, just at sunset, three, five, or seven young women are to go into a garden, in which there is no other person, and each gather a sprig of red sage, and then going into a room by themselves, set a stool in the middle of the room, and on it a clean bason full of water, in which the sprigs of sage are put, and tying a line across the room, on one side of the stool, each woman is to hang on it a clean apron turned the wrong side outwards, then all are to sit down in a row, on the opposite side of the stool, as far distant as the room will admit not speaking the whole time, whatever they see, and in a few minutes after twelve each one’s future husband will take her sprig out of the rose water and sprinkle her with it.

ANOTHER WAY TO SEE A SPOUSE IN A DREAM.—The party inquiring must be in a different county from that in which she commonly resides, and on going to bed must knit the left garter about the right leg stocking letting the other garter and stocking alone; and as you rehearse the following verses, at every comma knit a knot:—
This knot I knit, to know the thing I know not yet,
That I may see, the man that shall my husband be,
How he goes, and what he wears,
And what he does all days and years.
Accordingly in a dream, he will appear with the insignia of his trade and profession.

To know if your present Sweetheart will marry you.—Let any unmarried woman take the blade bone of a shoulder of lamb, and borrowing a pen knife (but be sure not to mention for what purpose) on going to bed stick the knife once through the bone every night, for nine nights in different places, repeating every night, while sticking the knife, these words:—
’Tis not this bone I mean to stick,
But my lover’s heart I mean to prick,
Wishing him neither rest or sleep,
Till he comes to speak.
Accordingly at the end of the nine days, or shortly after, he will ask for something to put to a wound he will have met with during the time you were charming him.

To know whether a Woman will hove the Man she wishes.—Get two lemon peels, wear them all day, one in each pocket; at night rub the four posts of the bedstead with them. If she is to suucceed the person will appear to her whilst asleep, and present her with a couple of lemons; if not, there is no hope.

For more, be sure to see the interpretation of symbols in dreams in The Universal Dreamer.

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